I Never Asked To Pay For Dinner
Guest Star Bondagebreak
Hi guys, I managed to get an article out of Bondagebreak, so read up. its unedited and uncensored.
Kahenya
I’m not complaining. I just want to let the guys know that when our mothers were going to Beijing for the so called Women’s’ rights, I wasn’t with them, I didn’t even support them. I wasn’t even a teenager. I didn’t ask to get a man’s job, I didn’t ask to be treated like a man, I didn’t ask to wear men’s clothes, I didn’t ask for anything. I just woke up one day and no man, no matter how muscled, would help me get the luggage onto a Matatu. Now all a man will tell you is, “you can do it yourself”, when I ask him to help me lift something heavy.
Cost sharing is everywhere nowadays. I have to share the bill with my date, I have to pay my own fare even if he’s the one who suggested that we go out and I want nothing to do with him. As you might have guessed, there is ever only one date for such men.
Yes I agree that some women like to keep men; younger men than them. But why oh, why must men treat even those women who are younger than them like their mothers. Some guys are chased away from home and the first thing they do is look for a girl who looks, acts, talks, cooks and cleans like their mothers. Such guys will then very shamelessly beat up their girlfriends for something very silly.
I once had a neighbour, Drew, who lived with Janet, a girl of 20. He was 24 at the time. She woke every morning to go sell mitumba clothes at Gikomba Market in Nairobi and every night, she came home with food and every so often, a new outfit for her man. She paid the rent when Drew was struggling. She saved a little money every month and took Drew out for dinner or a movie. So Drew decided that since his girlfriend was working and could handle the bills and entertainment, he didn’t need to do anything. So, every morning after his lady left he would put the TV – which his lady had bought – on, the volume at what sounded like 100% and the radio too. At around lunch time he’d come out, sit on the shared balcony with a toothpick in his mouth and let out a loud belch of satisfaction. What he’d eaten, we’ll never know, but he never contributed in a meaningful way towards his satisfaction, except maybe for stuffing the food in his mouth.
So a time came when his lady was with child and like any sensible parent would do Janet started to cut back on costs and save a little more in preparation for when the baby came. Drew on the other hand began to complain that Janet wasn’t spending as much on him as before and called her stingy. From that time to the day the child was born, they fought about everything from money, to clothes, to rent, to food …. Everything! When the baby came, it got worse and the fights became physical.
One Sunday morning, Drew and Janet were fighting and brought it out onto the balcony and Janet said something like, “what kind of a man lets his wife work when she’s pregnant or has just given birth? You are not a man; you’re just a little boy with a big body, useless…!!! ”
Drew became very angry and smacked Janet right across the face with the back of his hand. The baby was in her arms as she fell down right in front us. That night, Janet took the baby and left. Drew had gone to drink his shame and low self esteem away.
Now, I’m not saying our mothers did wrong in fighting for their rights and the rights of their girls, the future mothers. I’m just wishing they’d been smarter about what they asked for. Because of what our mothers asked for, we now have men like Drew living off of women, women younger than they are. Such men can be shameless and have no consciences.
Because of wanting to be equal to men, the men who are supposed to be providers and protectors now take advantage and say, “si mlienda Beijing kupigania haki zenu” (did you not go to Beijing to fight for your rights?), every time you ask them to help you do something, that usually, is a man’s job. A man won’t stand up for a pregnant woman in a Matatu or a public waiting area, or help an old lady with her luggage, or open the door for the lady in front of him, not that our African men ever did that anyway.
But the men aren’t all bad, and the ladies? Well, the ladies have had to come up with a way to survive, now that every man will say the women can do anything men can do, just to get out of doing something for the women. Some of the criminal masterminds of this world happen to be women. Women have decided to take control of their destiny. They have become everything, snipers, chefs, architects, engineers, hit men, body guards, gang leaders, carjackers, con artists, embezzlers (look at Margaret Gacara) internet hackers, murderers…you name it. They have become it just to survive in the world today. And a man will say, ‘they asked for it, didn’t they?’
Ladies, I don’t know, but maybe you could’ve asked that any man who decides he wants to be with a lady, be able to sustain her without struggling, but no! You had to do everything for yourself. You ladies really left the younger generation in a rut. Before a man dates a lady nowadays, he’ll probably have her investigated. He has to know how much she earns, because the general belief is that a woman who wants a man to pay all the bills is a gold digger, but no! That assumption couldn’t be more wrong.
A woman likes to be cared for, even though she can take care of herself. A woman will always take care of her man without question as long as she feels cared for by him. But Lo! Having to take care of themselves has hardened today’s woman. As soon as she feels unappreciated she’ll up and leave, thumping her chest in a manly way (figuratively speaking) and claiming that she doesn’t need a man to survive.
Such women, at 30 or 40 wake up to the realization that they might die old and alone and some end up keeping a man younger than they are. Some work out but rarely do you find a happily married couple where the Woman is the sole provider and the man the recipient. Such relationships leave the woman bitter, regretful and unfulfilled, and all because our mothers went to Beijing.
Ladies, if you must, this time go to Beijing and demand to be treated with respect and that men pay for dinner and such things.
